Modern Weapons

[Elizabeth]

Do I see a horroresque movie I haven't seen? My eyes... I wonder if that's on Netflix...

[Madrigus]

I believe it is.

And I want to make my wife a boffer louisville slugger.

[Jacob]

Really? Wouldn't that make certain things... rather awkward?

Oh, you mean make a bat for her. I see.

[Elizabeth]

HAHAHAHAHA.... Modern Weapons... go with the model that plugs in, batteries run out...

[sndwurks]

John Dies at the End is not quite a horror movie. It's not quite a comedy. It has elements of both, but it is most certainly a strange film. That is the best way, I feel, to describe it. It tries to place itself firmly in the same family as Naked Lunch, Donnie Darko, and Being John Malkovich.

And yes, it's on Netflix.

[Merana33]

[gaelicwolf]

I have been meaning to see John Dies at the End, but I have yet to get around to it. But Netflix you say...

So I've been trying to think of all different things one could use as a viable boffer weapon (without getting slapped by a trout of shame), to help get people's ideas flowing.

Here's the preliminary list I have (including things other people have mentioned).

One-Handed Long
Shovel
Baseball Bat
Umbrella
Guitar
Broom
Crow Bar
Tire Iron (single spoke)
A Pipe
Golf Club (depending on it's length)
Cane
Police Baton

Two Handed/Staff
Hockey Stick
Walking Stick
Golf Club (depending on it's length)

Short/Small
Tire Iron (4 Spoke)
Flashlight
Tennis Racket
Wrench
Knife
Bottle

Throwing Weapons
Bottle/ Broken Bottle
Beakers
Swiss Army Knife
Knives

If you have any other ideas, feel free to contribute.
I figured since I've had a bit of a hard time trying to figure out what I want to use as a modern weapon, I'm sure there are others who are too.

[Henry Gondorf]

One hander's
Antique kitchen Cleavers
Sledge Hammers (claw, ball tine,)
2x4's
Pick Axes
Pry Bars (basic crowbar without the curve to it)

Two Hander's
Croquet Mallet
Cricket Bat
Full length Broom (Avoid long push brooms)
Most Garden tools with long handles
Metal Re-bar

Short/Small
Sawed off bat
Broken broom handle
nyn-x Yellow Pages (7 out of 10 hard cases agree this is a weapon)

Throwing Weapons
Lawn Bowling Balls
Lawn Darts (still confused if they are legal in RL or not)

That is what I got. And I admit some of them are reiterations of those already posted.

[Jaccob_Morris]

Also had some thought of course slightly themed

long/short weapon
a broken or collapsible pool cue

Two handed
a pool cue

Thrown
pool balls
pool rack

[Madrigus]